Sperm and Egg Friends

Also known as: Why I like to blog.

From the title of my blog, you might be expecting me to talk about my career (as a maternity RN) or give you a family science lecture.  Nope.  I just want to give you a brief background into why I blog.  I've always loved to read and write...I think I'd love to be a writer, but I just don't have the self-determination yet.  More than writing, though, I love connecting.  I take something I'm passionate about and I want to share it with others.  I like to share with like-minded people, and I like to share my knowledge with others who might take comfort from it or learn something new. 

The way I look it, you shouldn't reinvent the wheel if there's already one rolling in the right direction. 

When my husband and I were ready to start our family, our bodies had a different idea.  For a little over 18 months, we progressed through many stages of preparing for our future family.  At first, we thought it was just going to happen.  We were firm believers in "what happens (or doesn't happen) happens for a reason" and that it just wasn't the right time.  Then, we took steps to find out why it didn't happen...and more steps...and more steps.  Many hormone levels and fertility charts later, we were still left without answers.  At some point during the long process, I joined an online group that began as Pregnancy and Baby and merged into the TTC Boards.  TTC is forum speak for "trying to concieve."  Before I knew it, I was thrown into one of the most influential group of women that I've ever joined.  These women were determined.  They were knowledgable.  They were supportive.  When one woman posted about her struggles, another would help her research some answers and guide her in the right direction.  We laughed about the bits of humor in our days, and we cried when another member discovered she was not pregnant for another month.  We cheered at the top of our lungs (which consisted of ALL CAPITAL LETTERS!!!) when one of us got her BFP (big fat positive pregnancy test).  Where else could I have taken my defective pregnancy test, smashed it to bits with a hammer and then posted a picture to others who could understand why?  I spent a good part of a year and a half watching women come and go with this group, and I eventually became the moderator of several boards.  I loved it.  I could take my struggles, use my knowledge, and help someone else.  I was always disappointed when I didn't get to move on to the pregnancy boards, but I felt great knowing that I could help someone else. 

Of course, I couldn't call me blog "can mama do it all?" if I never became a mama.  I did eventually get my BFP and moved on to become moderator of what was the "Due in November" boards.  Here, I already had knowledge to share.  I used my maternity background to answer pregnancy questions and delivery day advice.  In turn, they offered me support during my awful months of morning sickness.  We helped each other. 

I know, I know.  I need to be in the real world.  These virtual friends could not possibly be real friends, right?  Wrong.  Some of these women are still dear friends today.  Women that I can call on when I need support.  I have met several of them IRL (in real life) and we still share pictures of our children and have grown to learn from each other in our posts.  Most of us moved together to a board that our friend Tracy set up that she aptly named "Hot Heavenly Mamas" and now most of us are friends on facebook.  I love to read about Tracy's birds, Anna's journey with cloth diapers and homeschooling, Sheila's photography, and Diedra's graduation from nursing school.  It facinates me to think that Kara is still in Texas (her sign on was Karaintx) but that I've moved across the country to the Northeast.  I love to see all the kids who were born in the same chilly November growing up, and I love to see all the additions to the families.  My husband has always called these friends my "sperm and egg friends" from the days of the infertility struggles. 

What does this have to do with my life as an overwhelmed mom?  I hope that by sharing what I've learned along the way and encouraging my friends to share in their experiences as they learn to juggle life's many roles that we will all be better for it.  No sense in reinventing the wheel if we can all just hop on the ride!  So, please, if you are a mama who is trying to do it all, ask for advice.  If you have found a way to make part of your life easier, share it.  Invite your friends to read more, and let me know what you want to see more of...mama CAN do a lot, and I'd love to make it easier for you to do all you want to do, too!